HARRIS finally breaks down and visits a remote northern reservation. With news crews following her around as they tour the place,

 

HARRIS finally breaks down and visits a remote northern reservation. With news crews following her around as they tour the place, the Vice President asks the chief if there was anything they need.

"Well," says the chief, "We have three very important needs. First, we have a medical clinic but no doctor to man it."

Harris whips out her cellphone, dials a number, talks to somebody for two minutes and then hangs up. "I've pulled some strings. Your doctor will arrive in a few days. 

Now what was the second problem?"

"We have no way to get clean water. The local mining operation has poisoned the water our people have been drinking for dozens of years. We've been flying bottled water in, and it's terribly expensive."

Once again, Harris dials on her cellphone a number, yells into her cellphone for a few minutes, and then hangs up. "The mine has been shut down, and the owner is being billed for setting up a purification plant for your people.  

Now what was that third problem?"

The chief looks at her and says, "We have no cellphone reception up here…!"