For many, this holiday season was particularly difficult. We have been experiencing waves of energy that seem to dig up and expose insecurities and fears. Some of you may be feeling that the box of limitations and expectations that we have had in our lives was not only still there, but the fit was even tighter than before! It is that feeling of “a square peg trying to fit in a round hole.” It never fit, but now it REALLY doesn’t fit. All of this is uncomfortable and can be quite triggering, but it does have a purpose. It is showing us how much we have grown and how much we are shifting. We are in this continuous spiral of energy waves, downloads, and clearing. Often it is not until we feel the tight confines again that we realize just how much we have expanded. We need to see triggers for the gifts that they are. They are here to shift us to the next stages of our reality. It’s up to us not to drag the old into the new. It can help to dissect the trigger. Ask yourself these questions, and go as in-depth as possible: - How did this make you feel? (emotional layer)
- What thoughts went through your mind? (mental layer)
- Do those thoughts remind you of someone who may have said them to you or had that belief system? (mental & emotional layer)
- Where am I holding this in my body? What hurts right now or feels tight? What is flaring up? (physical layer)
- Why did I need or create this triggering? How is it serving me? What is it teaching me? (spiritual layer)
The last question is very important. It is how we shift from feeling powerless or becoming lost in victim mode. Recently, I had an incident that rocked my foundation. I was deep in sadness and was crying to my husband. He held me and told me to get it all out. Then he looked at me and said, “Jen, you are so powerful. Why did you create this?” The question hit me like a ton of bricks. My crying quieted, and I let my heart speak. I understood at that moment that while the situation was painful, it was exactly what I needed to shift myself out of a pattern that was no longer working. It also showed me again that my Soul has my back. It will move me, shift me, align me, and destroy things that are not in my highest and best soul growth. This is even more true when we have committed to walking the awakening path. I am a powerful creator, and so are you. We are creating our reality as we embody more. When feeling triggered, ask yourself why you created the situation. Ask yourself why it was needed, and see if you are able to come to a higher understanding that will help you let go and move on. It doesn’t mean things don’t hurt, and that hurt needs to be acknowledged, but it helps to see the higher purpose. There is also an Energy of Closure this Holiday season that will continue through 2025. For Christmas, I returned back to my home state of Maryland. We had an opportunity to take a drive to our old farmhouse. As we drove down the street I was flooded with memories. When we moved to the farm, we had so many big plans. Four months after we moved, I was hit by a drunk driver. My back was broken, and those dreams were crushed. Eventually, the farm went into foreclosure. We left it all behind, heading to Colorado in 2012 with four kids on just a hope and a prayer. Once in Colorado, my awakening journey accelerated, and now my life in Maryland feels like a past life or a dream. I hold such gratitude for the drunk driver and all that was destroyed and created. I fulfilled her soul contract to be involved in something so serious, and she fulfilled my soul contract to experience incredible collapse of health, money, and identity. In all of that pain and loss, I found me. As we drove away from the house, I felt deep closure. That night, I dreamed that these little flames were returning to my energy body. I could see them anchoring in and my field becoming stronger than ever. I woke from the dream and asked my team to explain the dream. They shared that it was bits of myself from that life, that timeline, returning to me. They explained that this is part of the reconciliation process we are going through. I’ve shared prior that we are in an intense energetic portal that will shift us completely. We are coming home to ourselves, pulling ourselves back through all space and time. It was explained to me that as these pieces integrate, there can be a resurgence of deep emotions and even physical manifestation in the body of what was. I understand the flames that returned to me, I know the context and how to work through it. However, much of what is returning we may have no context for. It can feel as if we are thrown into an emotional blender, and the potential for overwhelm is high. It is advised that we sit with all that arises, allowing the emotions and even the body pains to pass through us without creating stories as to WHY we are feeling a certain way. When we allow the feelings to pass through, we then allow it all to anchor within us as pure light, versus one more thing to heal. What a journey we are on! In many ways it is just getting started!
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